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palooka has added 8111 words, 114 lists, 740 comments, and 2893 tags.

You Need Not Apply

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Phrases & terms from help-wanted ads.
Words 1 through 76 of 76
you are always the best at everything you do   has been listed 1 time with 0 comments
please no phone calls   has been listed 1 time with 0 comments
highly preferred, but not required.   has been listed 1 time with 0 comments
proven track-record   has been listed 1 time with 0 comments
help build excitement   has been listed 1 time with 0 comments
come sell something exciting!   has been listed 1 time with 0 comments
eager to learn   has been listed 1 time with 0 comments
absolutely no experience necessary   has been listed 1 time with 0 comments
background checks are conducted   has been listed 1 time with 0 comments
we pay weekly   has been listed 1 time with 0 comments
own an appropriate vehicle   has been listed 1 time with 0 comments
tell us why you are interested   has been listed 1 time with 0 comments
full union benefits   has been listed 1 time with 0 comments
on-call only   has been listed 1 time with 0 comments
swing and grave   has been listed 1 time with 0 comments
multicultural, multilingual setting   has been listed 1 time with 0 comments
stoop, kneel, crouch, or crawl   has been listed 1 time with 0 comments
and comprehend simple instructions   has been listed 1 time with 0 comments
please contact tammy   has been listed 1 time with 0 comments
if you have the stuff we’ll know   has been listed 1 time with 0 comments
you have a burning desire to succeed   has been listed 1 time with 0 comments
so apply now!   has been listed 1 time with 0 comments
satisfies and delights our customers   has been listed 1 time with 0 comments
wanted: people with passion   has been listed 1 time with 0 comments
no medical or retirement benefits   has been listed 1 time with 0 comments
and a genuine interest in dogs   has been listed 1 time with 0 comments
ability to work cross-functionally   has been listed 1 time with 0 comments
spanish is a plus   has been listed 1 time with 0 comments
must have truck and tools   has been listed 1 time with 0 comments
tell us about yourself   has been listed 1 time with 0 comments
and winning personalities!   has been listed 1 time with 0 comments
is a big plus   has been listed 1 time with 0 comments
this will change your life!   has been listed 1 time with 0 comments
your infectious positive energy   has been listed 1 time with 2 comments
you are a seasoned listener   has been listed 1 time with 0 comments
sit for extended periods of time   has been listed 1 time with 0 comments
and meet tight deadlines   has been listed 1 time with 0 comments
very, very detail oriented   has been listed 1 time with 0 comments
has a quick smile   has been listed 1 time with 0 comments
crackerjack skills   has been listed 1 time with 0 comments
able to create order out of chaos   has been listed 1 time with 0 comments
managing enhancement projects   has been listed 1 time with 0 comments
seeking money-motivated superstars   has been listed 1 time with 0 comments
an individual who knows pizza   has been listed 3 times with 10 comments
need 18-30 guys and gals   has been listed 1 time with 0 comments
be available immediately   has been listed 1 time with 0 comments
feel comfortable working with women   has been listed 1 time with 0 comments
a bright, self-starter   has been listed 1 time with 0 comments
no felony convictions   has been listed 1 time with 0 comments
able to wear a uniform   has been listed 1 time with 0 comments
able to work in the us   has been listed 1 time with 0 comments
apply in person only   has been listed 1 time with 0 comments
cash tips daily   has been listed 1 time with 1 comment
moms welcome   has been listed 1 time with 0 comments
quick minded   has been listed 1 time with 0 comments
if this sounds like you   has been listed 1 time with 0 comments
this could be your opportunity   has been listed 1 time with 0 comments
physically demanding position   has been listed 1 time with 0 comments
days and hours may vary   has been listed 1 time with 0 comments
the candidate selected   has been listed 1 time with 0 comments
capable of performing   has been listed 1 time with 0 comments
embraces diversity   has been listed 1 time with 0 comments
detailed work history   has been listed 1 time with 0 comments
parking available   has been listed 1 time with 0 comments
your resume demonstrates   has been listed 1 time with 0 comments
thrive on pressure   has been listed 1 time with 0 comments
extremely high caliber   has been listed 1 time with 0 comments
work autonomously   has been listed 1 time with 0 comments
strong work ethic   has been listed 1 time with 0 comments
punctual   has been listed 7 times with 0 comments
enthusiasm and passion   has been listed 1 time with 0 comments
customer-centric philosophy   has been listed 1 time with 0 comments
will include weekends   has been listed 1 time with 0 comments
eager to work   has been listed 1 time with 0 comments
fast paced environment   has been listed 1 time with 0 comments
proactive   has been listed 20 times with 2 comments
Words 1 through 76 of 76
comments for this list
(add comments for specific words on the word pages themselves)
about 3 hours ago palooka said:

I like an employee who can't sleep - think of all the hours of work I'll get out of him!

about 7 hours ago reesetee said:

I'm sure. The man sleeps like a goldfish.

about 9 hours ago dontcry said:

I'm right behind you! You know, he'll probably still be up when we get there!

about 10 hours ago reesetee said:

That does it. Let's go visit him. *grabbing luggage*

about 11 hours ago dontcry said:

He's got the "multi's" nailed! Why, I bet right now, as I type, he's sitting under a fig tree, sipping something red and sampling a heavenly antipasto.

about 15 hours ago reesetee said:

Ditto, dontcry! :-D Besides, isn't this a multicultural, multilingual setting? Pro's all over that.

about 16 hours ago dontcry said:

He's always satisfied and delighted me ;)!

1 day ago palooka said:

Thanks reesetee. I'll need to see Prolagus'resume - will he satisfy & delight our customers as you have?

1 day ago reesetee said:

Hire Pro! I'm sure he's eager to work, and he has a customer-centric philosophy. He is quick minded and, as far as we know, has no felony convictions.

Also, he makes a rip-roaringly good tiramisù. ;-)

5 days ago palooka said:

I've only seen that infrequently here. Interesting sentiment.

5 days ago bilby said:

I have a feeling Prolagus might also be an individual who knows pizza if there are any more positions.
One barbarous bit of snidery I see in job ads here is previous applicants need not re-apply. Ouch!

5 days ago palooka said:

What's the matter bilby, none of these fit you? I was able to hire reesetee. He proved to be an individual who really knows pizza.

5 days ago bilby said:

Help!

8 months ago reesetee said:

Yes, I love that kind of thing in ads (meaning I hate that kind of thing in ads): they list a whole slew of qualities for which you should probably see a therapist, but they tout them as excellent employee traits. :-)

8 months ago palooka said:

Thanks yarb - good point! Employers start off dreaming & then have to face reality.

I think the only qualification listed I meet is that I have a genuine interest in dogs.

Who thrives on pressure? Do they realize that help is available?

8 months ago yarb said:

Ha ha. Great list - what comes across is the conflict inherent in help wanted ads: (i) "we only want the best", and at the same time the subtext (ii) "please apply, we'll take anyone!"

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